I don't like the Jones'. The have nice clothes, cool cars, and huge homes with pools the size of lakes. Their teeth are even whiter than normal people.
I used to hate them. I use to hate them so much that I wanted bad luck and locusts to descend on them. I wanted their diving boards to break in mid-jump. I wanted misery unlike anything ever seen. (I admit that I can be a tad malicious at times--it's a flaw.)
Then I realized, those Jones' that I despised so much weren't as happy as I'd once thought. Those clothes were purchased with a store credit card at 20%+ interest. The cool car was leased and they'll never own it. A pool the size of a lake isn't cheap and they'll be 80 before the sucker is paid off. And the huge McMansion house? Well forget about ever seeing the light at the end of that mortgage. I bet that payment bites ass too.
I also realized that I'd tried desperately to keep up with them. Okay, so my house isn't a McMansion, but it is beautiful. And it's more than I can afford. Well, it's more than I can afford and do things like vacation, swim lessons, date night more frequent that lunar eclipses, and peace of mind--which I'm finding, in my old age, is worth way more than cool stuff.
Here comes the downsizing dilemma...
Let's face it, downsizing sucks.
I like my random crap stuffed in every crevice--even if I couldn't tell you why I want it or why I need it. It's my crap and I'll stuff it where I want. I like having a huge house that takes a week to clean because I have two children hellbent on tearing it up like miniature hurricanes on speed. My kitchen is massive. The island is 5x3 feet of solid clutter capturing perfection. Oh, and the desk area with the cubbies. God loves me. I know because He gave me this desk area to put all sorts of random unneeded receipts, papers, and notes that I have to tear through every time I want something because I couldn't find it even with a Hail Mary and a Thank you Jesus.
Now for some serious...
I'm tired of living just to pay my bills. I'd like to live a little. Time is precious. My kids are getting older and I'd like them to experience parents that aren't stressed about work and bills and everything in between. Look, I know moving, downsizing, etc isn't the green-grassed bliss that I want it to be. I will still have bills, but maybe, just maybe, I'll have enough money left over to have a little fun which will make the bill paying not hurt so much.
Will I like where this goes? Probably not. Maybe writing it down will make the choices clearer and the worry not so heavy though.
